Married. How do you enter your day being reverently and deliberately married?

“Therefore marriage is not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, deliberately, and in accordance with the purposes for which it was instituted by God.”

married reverently

I’ve begun reading John & Stasi Eldridge’s book Love & War:  Find your way to something beautiful in your marriage.

The beginning of the book opens with Stasi reflecting as her husband, John, is officiating at a wedding.  The above quote is part of the ceremony.

When did you last attend a wedding?

Did you pay attention to the words – the promises – spoken?

Reverently enter being married.

Revere – to show great respect.  Every day we wake up beside the person we married, we’re entering into another day of marriage.

Do you show great reverence and respect for your marriage union?  How does this translate into your everyday life?  

Deliberately enter being married.

Deliberate – to move with steadiness and intention.

When you walk through your day – your week, and month and years, how do you demonstrate intentional and steady marriage movement?

For what purpose has God designed marriage?

Purpose – the reason something exists, an intended and desired result.

The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him…

So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.

 The man said,

“This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
for she was taken out of man.”

That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

~ Genesis 2: 18, 21-24

We chose to be married to have a partner through life.  To not be alone.  To be one flesh – united.

Being married means you leave your parents and their opinion is no longer your first concern.  (Neither are your children, even though they came from you and your spouse.)

Our spouse is a gift.

How do you deliberately and reverently show your spouse – the one you chose to marry – that you view her or him as a gift?

Here are 3 ways to enter your day being deliberately and reverently married:

  1. Pray.  Pray for your spouse, pray for your marriage relationship.  Ask God to show you how He views your spouse.  Pray for your future together.  Ask for direction, ask for blessing, ask for protection from the evil one.  Take the time to pray!
  2. Believe.  Believe that your spouse is a gift.  Have faith that God created him or her for you.  Work on your own faith in God, because if you can have faith in small things, then all the big issues can also be solved.  Read Matthew 17:20
  3. Act.  Refuse to be blown this way and that by your ‘feelings’.  Feelings are fleeting.  Use your own self-control, develop it!  Stop reacting!  Decide to act, then take action in ways to demonstrate you value your spouse.  Be deliberate.

Is this difficult?  Maybe, in some seasons of marriage.

Is this sustainable?  Yes.  As long as you begin again – every day.

How do you sustain reverence for your marriage, even in a difficult season?

 Have you seen our video? 

We know that some days, months and even years in a marriage are not easy… we all get “down”. Life seems mundane and without any spark. That’s why we created #93toJOY – 93 small, quick and affordable things to do together to spark some JOY!