Our 1st-world culture is image obsessed. We see evidence in kids going back to school, in advertisements in magazines and on television.  I’m sure you’re not shocked – it’s not like adorning our bodies is something new…

How about you? Are you a stylish person? Do you subscribe to a certain outlook on appearance?

No matter if you’re fashion forward – or backward – or have your own way of expressing your identity through fashion:

What you wear will either encourage or discourage

…your spouse.

And influence those around you.

I’m suggesting we all need to be deliberate in some areas of our appearance.

3 Things 

When this post began it had 3 points – and ended up at over 1000 words.  Much too long. So I divided it up into three parts – one post for today, one post for tomorrow and the last on Monday.

  1. Do you look like you’re married?
  2. Are you highlighting what he/she enjoys?
  3. What are your cues?

This is the first.

 When your spouse looks at you – sees you and how you’ve chosen to adorn yourself :

Do you look like you’re married?  

A few years ago I accompanied Robert on a business trip to Munich, Germany. While he worked, I toured the city using the Bahnhof (train). Entering the underground station, there are unmanned kiosks to view the stops and purchase tickets. At one of these kiosks an English speaking man struck up a conversation about how to make a ticket choice (I can read and understand some German and he couldn’t). I was friendly. Then he asked me to meet him at the end of the day for a drink.

I was shocked, and stammered a bit before I said I couldn’t because I was married. He pointedly looked at my left hand.

It was bare.

I’d deliberately left my rings at home, because the prongs holding the stones had 25+ years of wear and I was concerned I’d loose them. But that didn’t matter. I did not appear married. Even to a stranger…

Yes, there’re lots of passably reasonable reasons not to wear your wedding rings. You might have yours – but I’m not here to argue about it.

My point?

Wedding rings are an outward signal – a tangible sign to you, your spouse, and all you come into contact with that you have made a vow to be faithful to your spouse. A ring on your finger signifies this choice. Like the idea, or don’t like the idea – have cultural, theological or ideological issues, it still doesn’t matter. To our 1st-world culture, a ring on the 4th finger of the left hand signifies marriage.

Do your hands say you’re married?

Your spouse will notice and so will others.

Want an opportunity to encourage your spouse?  

Use your smart phone – take a picture of your rings on your hand

– and text it to your spouse.

Say, “I’m so happy to be married to you!”

Tomorrow we’ll move on to #2 –  “Are you highlighting what he/she enjoys?”  Stay tuned…