Answers to Questions – Ongoing Learning on Making a HOME

No matter how old we are – or how many children, or years married, we all still have room to grow.

(There are lots of areas in which I’m still learning… how about you?)

Do you have questions on

… how to manage your time

… how to make more healthy choices…

… how to build better relationships, including in parenting & marriage

…how to invest and use your money wisely…

and more…

Today there’s an opportunity – available for only a few days – to purchase a library…

to use on your e-reader, your computer, your tablet, your smart-phone…

Here’s a library to answer your questions!

78 ebooks  + 2 audio files + 2 e-courses + 2 printables = a value of over $900.

Cost?  $29.97

(Click on the photos to go to the offer – learn more or purchase!

Yup. It’s an affiliate link.)

SEVENTY-EIGHT books!

 Wow.

The nice part of this bundle, is if you’re not needing every book, you can “gift” one to a friend.

Have questions about marriage? 

5 books in this bundle directly address questions you have in your marriage!

I’ll be reviewing  “Dear Wife”- tomorrow!

Don’t miss the opportunity…

To have a library of resources:

When? 8 a.m. EST Wednesday, April 23 until 11:59 p.m. EST Monday, April 28

What? 78 eBooks, 2 eCourses, 2 audio files, and 2 printable packs

Where? Purchase the bundle here.

How much?  The entire package is worth nearly $900, and it’s selling for less than $30.

It’s a sweet deal!

Here’s more information on the rest of the books…

 

Oh – I almost forgot… BONUS PRODUCTS!

Over the next five days I’ll be reviewing books from this bundle!
Thanks for reading!

Adding Some Grace into Your Marriage: Book Review

Adding Some Grace into Your Marriage: Book Review

I’ve been carrying this book with me for a while

Grace Filled Marriage Grabbing the Moments

It’s been:

  • in the truck as we did errands
  • in my bag as we went to Canada
  • sitting on the table at my Mom’s diningroom
  • in my lap-top case at a conference in Detroit
  • beside the bed in the most comfortable hotel room I’ve had the pleasure to sleep in
  • at the table after touring Bob Evans Homestead
  • and on the couch in my sunroom

You’d think I was just hauling it from state to state and country to country without reading. You’d be wrong. I keep opening the book, reading a bit… pondering… deciding  this current bit is my favorite part of the book and then carrying on in life.

This is not my usual modus operandi when reading a book. I’m a consumer of books.  (Just ask Robert about the Amazon one-click charges at the end of the month!) One big bite – and it’s done.  Not this book.

What keeps me coming back for more?

Why have I delayed in writing this review? (I was provided a copy to review.)

What’s different about this book? Why do I keep picking it up and reading or re-reading parts?

Tim Kimmel (and his wife, Darcy) have communicated facts and stats quite competently in “Grace Filled Marriage”. Lots of marriage books do that. It’s organized in an attractive fashion. Yup. Many books are well organized. There are real-life stories of couples and Biblical examples. Good stuff. Valuable.

But what’s the unique impact in this book (for me) compared to others I’ve read this year?

It finally hit me as I opened the book once again this morning…

Imagery

Imagery is like mind-candy. (Read an interesting definition here

Here’s the example phase on page 166 that finally brought clarity to why I keep opening this book:

“… they ended up as sock puppets to the enemy.”

Sock Puppets.

Remember sock puppets?

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Manipulation. There’s no motivation in sock puppets until something manipulates it. And those sock puppets usually look pretty stupid.

That phrase, “sock puppets” got me considering in what other places I’m letting the evil one manipulate me – rather than responding with grace.

The imagery, and the turns of phrase Tim Kimmel uses, keeps my mind engaged while reading the book, and then invites me to keep on applying the concepts. It’s almost funny how often, as I’m reading, I look up and just whisper-shout, “Yes!”. (If I wasn’t holding the book, my arm would be raised in a fisted exclamation.)

And maybe more.

And maybe it’s more than the imagery alone.

  • I’m also drawn to how the author relates with me, the reader. He shows his personal vulnerability – and self deprecating humor – when telling stories of he and his wife.  And he shares from his life. (I dare you not to cry when you read the poem he wrote for his daughter’s wedding. BTW, their daughter’s name is Karis – the Greek word for grace.)
  • I identify with the future focus of the promise Grace will bring to everyone’s marriage
    • a secure love
    • a significant purpose
    • a strong hope
    • to be different and vulnerable
    • to be candid and make mistakes
  • I appreciate the study guide. There’s a study guide included – it asks probing questions to explore the concepts of the book.  Whether you choose to read the book on your own, with your spouse, or as a small group, consider using the study guide as a companion to enhance your learning.

Grace Filled Marriage

“The missing piece. The place to start.”

I like the subheading of this book – it intimates that it’s useful for us couples married many decades, and also for those just beginning the marriage journey. And it delivers the promise.

Robert and I have been invited to attend a wedding this month. I’ve already gathered some marriage books for the young couple and “Grace Filled Marriage” is going to be a part of the bundle. Check it out – it’s available as a hardback book and also an ebook.

What draws you to a particular book? 

Have you read “Grace Filled Marriage”? What were your impressions?

 

Grabbing the Moments

Grabbing the Moments

Sharing what we learn and read is important. And even though Robert and I work from home, one room away from each other, we can spend an entire day on separate computers only meeting in passing with a kiss in the hall.

So sometimes we go on errands together. We grab the moments.

Sharing What We Read

One of our differentiating values as a couple is “Discovery”. (Seeing, experiencing, learning and doing new things.) That’s why books are a huge part of our marriage.

As we were out and about today, I shared with Robert the book I’m reading, Grace Filled Marriage by Dr. Tim Kimmel. Robert enjoys when I read aloud the parts I find interesting – often those bits will spark interesting conversations…

I’ll be reviewing the book in the next few days… lots to discuss!

How do you share what you’re reading or learning with your spouse?

Do you read aloud to each other? – Watch educational programs together? –

One guy I know watches cooking shows and then makes the recipes for his family…

Some of my favorite things…

Hello.

I’m Lori.

And I’m a book-a-holic.

Big books, small books, any books, all books, every book, many books, children’s books,  picture books, booklets, cook books, non-fiction books, marriage books, hymn books, happily-ever-after books, travel books, poetry books, old books, new books  (you get the idea).

Our credit card statements testify to my love of books, so the very best Christmas gifts for me are Amazon gift cards. (Thanks Mom & Dad-in-Law 🙂 )  Fortunately, Robert, my husband, is also a book-lover and knows reading is as important to me as breathing. We regularly share ideas and thoughts and passages from whatever book we’re reading. And when we travel by car (which we do often) I read out loud…

So – because this blog is about encouraging your spouse, and so much encouragement and insight can be found in books, I’d like to share with you…

Some of my Favorite Marriage Books:

  •  The Bible.  Oh, you didn’t know this is a marriage book? Well, it’s the best happily-ever-after book there is… Just think:  You have a bridegroom who would do anything, including give up his life, for his bride. There are also stories of  love at first sight (Isaac & Rebecca), of a commoner marrying a king (Esther & King Ahasuerus), of a man loving a fallen woman and continually forgiving (Gomer & Hosea), of a man and woman created for each other (Adam and Eve), about romantic and erotic love between a man and a woman (Song of Songs), and more.  Have you ever read the Bible like it’s a love story?
  • The Five Love Languages – By Gary ChapmanEven if you don’t like to read – at all – I’d recommend having this one book. It’s a simple concept that can be translated into every relationship you have.  Robert and I give this book to every couple we spend time with. If you’re interested, I wrote about it here.  Do you know what language your spouse speaks when they’re trying to show you love?  Do you know your love language?
  • Real Marriage – by Grace and Mark Driscoll. This is a book that covers all aspects of marriage – including those sex questions you might wonder about. But my favorite part of the book is the chapter on Friendship. I wrote about this book here.  How do you show your spouse that he or she is your friend?
  • Love is a Decision – by Gary Smalley and John Trent. Sometimes you just need to have a plan. This book is about creating a plan to love your spouse. Creating a plan for your marriage means you’re in it – to win it!  Here’s a little more about this book. Do you and your spouse have a plan for your marriage?
  • The Five Languages of Apology – by Gary Chapman & Jennifer Thomas. This isn’t only a marriage book – although it’s definitely useful for your marriage! Have you ever apologized to your spouse, yet he or she didn’t react well to your apology?  Perhaps you’re missing something… There are 5 ways to apologize.  I wrote about this book here.   Would you like to receive a copy of this book?  Just leave a comment and we’ll randomly choose a winner!


Of course, there are lots of other marriage books I like – I’ve listed others here.

Do you have any favorite marriage books to recommend?

 

Hey – I’m always ready to read another book! 🙂

Remember – Leave a comment – Have a chance to receive a free book! 

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry.

We’re heading into a season of human interaction.

The Thanksgiving Weekend – for those in the USA.

Christmas – New Year.

All year long we interact with others, but this time of year the interactions have overarching expectations.  We’re supposed to be having fun, and bonding, and enjoying festivities.

We’re focused on being thankful – in all circumstances. W’e’re immersed in the holiness of the birth of Christ. We’re uniting with loved ones over meticulously prepared meals in thoughtfully decorated homes. We’re traveling. We’re giving and receiving packages purchased (or created) in a mad rush or stolen moments or proactively planned parcels of time.

All these interactions take energy. Expended energy creates tired people.

Tired people make mistakes.

Mistakes create tension.

Tension causes disagreements.

Disagreements begin less-than-positive interactions…

I’m guessing at some point in the next 2 months, you’re going to need to say…

“I’m sorry.”

How do you apologize?  Effectively?

A few weeks ago Robert and I had the pleasure of spending an evening with JT and Jennifer Thomas. They graciously invited us into their home and shared from their hearts some stories of their life.* What was the catalyst for this time together?

Jennifer Thomas is the co-author of “The Five Languages of Apology”.  When I wrote a post about this book on Leadership Couples, Jennifer reached out – and we took the opportunity to connect.

The Five Languages of Apology

This book answers both how to apologize – and why your apology may not be effective.

Gary Chapman (author of “The Five Love Languages”) and Jennifer Thomas wrote this book after years of research. They  present the five fundamental aspects of an apology as:

  1. Expressing Regret. “I am sorry”
  2. Accepting Responsibility. “I was wrong.”
  3. Making Restitution. “What can I do to make it right?”
  4. Genuinely Repenting. “I’ll try not to do that again.”
  5. Requesting Forgiveness. “Will you please forgive me?”

In our conversation together, Jennifer shared that these fundamentals first grew from an interaction she and JT had over an issue. Jennifer apologized, but JT needed to hear more than an “I’m sorry.”  He needed Jennifer to accept responsibility.  He needed to hear the words, “I was wrong”.

The story of how the book progressed from an idea, to a possible article, into research and a co-authored book is found in the introduction. It’s a beautiful illustration of how sharing an idea can grow (after much work) into a powerful gift to benefit many people.

Who would benefit from this book?

The simple answer? Everyone who messes up.

Expressing regret, accepting responsibility, repenting, asking for forgiveness, and making a plan to do better in the future is key to every relationship.  Spouse – parent – child – coworker – neighbor…  

Husbands & Wives.  “There are no healthy marriages without genuine apologies.”   Sharing life with your spouse isn’t always champagne and roses – there are disagreements in a marriage. (Shocking, I know.)  Is your apology accepted by your spouse?  All through this book are illustrations of husbands and wives learning how to effectively apologize.

Parents.  How do you teach your children to apologize? There’s a really great chapter walking parents through the process of teaching their children to:  1. Accept Responsibility for their Actions –  2.  Learn How Their Actions Affect Others – 3. Understand there are Rules in Life – 4. How Apologies Restore Friendships – 5. How to Teach Children the Languages of Apology.  I really like the statement toward the end of this chapter, “Young children do what parents say – older children do what parents do.” This way parents and children can learn the valuable skill of apology – together.

And then there are chapters for employers, employees, those dating, a personal profile inventory, and a group study guide. In the chapter about making restitution, illustrations are given to use your spouses’ love language as part of an apology.

Would you like to read this book?

We have a copy to give away…

Robert and I feel the concepts in this book are so valuable, we want to share it with you. If you’re interested, just leave a comment at the end of this post.  You could even share your thoughts on what makes up an effective apology…

Next week – on Monday, November 26th – I’ll announce who won a copy of “The Five Languages of Apology”!  (Then I’ll get Robert to mail it to you, ’cause he’s good at those “follow-through” things.)

 *Robert is going to write a post about our time with Jennifer and JT Thomas.  We’ll give another copy of this book away then.  I’ll keep you posted so you have another chance to receive a free copy.

Don’t forget – leave a comment… 🙂

 

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