Do you pay attention to your inner dialogue? Is it mostly positive or negative? If you did a thought inventory, what was the last good or positive thought you had about your spouse?
- Was it about a character quality you admire?
- Was it in appreciation for an action he/she took – for you or on behalf of someone else?
- Were you reminiscing about a past experience? Do you spend any time recalling happy events?
Our thoughts go before us.
They’re the spark to initiate words and actions.
If you don’t like the words coming out of your mouth, then pay attention to your thoughts. If your actions toward your spouse are less than loving, pay attention to your thoughts.
Here’s a kinesthetic activity to do a “thought” inventory:
At the beginning of the day, put 10 pennies in your left pocket. Every time you find yourself thinking something positive about your spouse, transfer one penny to your right pocket.
At the end of the day, how many pennies will be in your right pocket?