Encouraging Words: Advocate

Encouraging Words:  Advocate

You are a spouse.

A Wife  -  A Husband

In our role as husband or wife, different seasons in marriage require varying talents.

There are seasons where one spouse may wear the badge “wage-earner” and the other “child-nurturer”.  Later in life we’ve seen husband or wife wear the tag “care-giver” for the other.

Being a husband – or wife – means shifting from one label to another as our path through marriage necessitates.  It’s a fluid process and we’re rarely aware of the label we’re wearing.

What other labels might we wear in our role as spouse?

  • head cook and bottle washer
  • laundry chief
  • financial guru
  • killer-of-the-spiders
  • maintenance maven
  • food critic tester
  • jar opener extraordinaire
  • chauffeur
  • romantic bed-rocker
  • voice-of-reason
  • celebration whiz
  • barbecue ace
  • merriment initiator

Some tags we always wear.

In marriage there are some tags both husband and wife always wear.  (I’m sure you have your list of must-haves.)

May I suggest one more?

An Advocate

An Advocate:  supports, watches over, urges, defends, pleads for and champions

One of the most fulfilling volunteer experiences I ever had was as a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) for children in foster care.  (Another name is Guardian Ad-Litem)

Here’s what a CASA does:

“CASA volunteers are appointed by judges to watch over and advocate for abused and neglected children, to make sure they don’t get lost in the overburdened legal and social service system or languish in inappropriate group or foster homes. Volunteers stay with each case until it is closed and the child is placed in a safe, permanent home. For many abused children, their CASA volunteer will be the one constant adult presence in their lives.”  ~ from the National CASA website

As a CASA I got to know the child by listening, and talking with everyone in that child’s life.    No matter how many foster care homes, case-workers or schools the child experienced, I was there to pay attention to what was happening in their life.  My role was to listen – then share information with the judge who would make the ultimate decision for what would be best for that child.  The judge expected me to advocate – support, watch over, defend and plead – for that child.  And pass all information I had on to him/her.

Spouse as Advocate

Has your spouse ever gone through moments – hours – days or months where they felt lost or neglected – when they lost their strength and became weak?

Have you stood with your spouse, listening, and caring for them with a constant heart? Have you spoken up for your spouse, perhaps in front of friends or family?  Have you defended your spouse from abuse and misuse?

Have you shared with God their woes, their concerns, their heartaches?  Have you asked for what they need – on their behalf?

You have been an advocate.

Advocating for your spouse is one aspect of encouragement that isn’t about cheer, or achieving goals or building.  But it is about strength.

An advocate stands in the gap.  An advocate bridges a gap.

Christ is our advocate.

… But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One.

~1 John 2:1

Who is a better example as an advocate than Jesus?  His prayer in John 17 is a beautiful example of an advocate sharing with the One who makes all decisions.

Have you ever stood as an advocate for your spouse?


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  1. This is good Lori. It reminds of the song by Amanda Marshall, I Believe in You: “I believe in you and all I want to do is to help you, believe in you.”

    Also, I don’t know if it’s just me but, the times that I’m called to be an advocate for my husband, usually seem to land at the very time that I’m the weakest! I think (but I could be wrong) this is God’s way of strengthening us, or at least one of the ways.
    Robyn Gibson recently posted..Trusting the heart of my husbandMy Profile

  2. Oh Robyn – I’m in tears! Thank you SO much for sharing that song. I’d never heard it…

    In case anyone else reads this, and wants to see/hear the song, here’s the link:


    It is amazing how and what God uses to build us into the person He needs us to be – I agree, even our own weak moments He uses…

  3. I have been an advocate for my husband, unfortunately…I had a friend in my women’s small group Bible study who randomly started ranting about her irritation about his faults. It was bizarre…my blood pressure rose but I managed to defend him calmly without freaking out rudely. And she later apologized so it all worked out.

    Being an advocate is definitely a part of being loyal to your spouse.
    Elizabeth@Warrior Wives recently posted..Veteran Warrior Wives NeededMy Profile

    • Thanks for sharing your experience, Elizabeth. Great point about loyalty, too. They go together and I don’t think you can have one without the other…

      Thank you for stopping by!

  4. Very good, Lori. You’ve hit the nail on the head. So many changes in our roles as we grow together. Companion is one of my favorite as it goes together so nicely with the other.
    Bonnie Anderson recently posted..My Ship has ArrivedMy Profile

    • Companion. Good one! Thanks, Bonnie.

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