Encouragers start conversations.

Encouragers start conversations.

If you were to use one word to describe each block of time in your day, which words would you use?

Wake – pray – read – exercise – shower – eat – drive – work – walk – eat – work – drive – eat – visit – TV – read – pray – sleep.

Now – how would you describe your conversations in an average day?

What about your conversations with your spouse?

What do you talk about with your spouse?

Conversations between husband and wife can become “pass the salt” kind of interactions. It happens.

The laundry needs to be put away.  The car needs an oil change.  The kid’s permission slip needs to be signed.  Pay the bills.  Turn off the lights.  Empty the dishwasher.  Weed the garden.  Head and shoulders, knees and toes…  Days go on.  And on.

But these types of lack-luster interactions don’t grow a life filled with purpose or meaning. Is it time to change the conversational direction – to put more into your interactions?

Plant a seed.

If you’re living in a hum-drum no-depth conversational rut (and want out) then start small.

Big, deep conversations grow from tiny seeds.

Many seeds are found in the Book of Proverbs.

Start a conversation with your spouse about a verse from Proverbs that catches your attention.  It’s a pretty dense book with so many nuggets.  Sip from it, like you would from a hot cup of coffee.

Here’s an example of a tiny ‘seed’ of a conversation starter:

Above all else, guard your heart,
for everything you do flows from it.

~ Proverbs 4:23

If you were to talk about this proverb, where would it lead?

Encouragers start conversations that make an impact.

How do you start deep conversations with your spouse?



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    • Thanks for stopping in, Robyn!

      The idea for this post came from my hubby, Robert. He’s been reading Proverbs – over and over for a few months. Every few days he’ll shout from the the other side of the house, “Hey – have you heard this one: …” And it gets us talking.

  1. How do you start a conversation about Proverbs w a husband who doesn’t want to talk about the Bible?

    • Hi Sarona – so happy to connect with you, and thank you for visiting.

      My initial reaction to your question is to suggest praying first – grab God’s attention and ask Him to guide you to which verse you should use as a conversation starter.

      I’ve used a verse from Proverbs to start conversations with those who are not Christians – and if they asked what the reference was, I just replied that I recently read a Proverb. This didn’t bring any raised eyebrows because there are many proverbs floating around – I just chose to use one from God’s Word.

      God is so kind – He’s given us the Truth in His Word and we can use it with a gentle hand – no need to force-feed Christian-speak or slam our Bibles down on the table.

      Even Paul used conversation starters with those who didn’t know Jesus. In Acts 17:22 Paul started a conversation with Athenians about stuff they already knew – their statues – and he was able to eventually talk about Jesus.

      I believe starting small – with direction from God – and moving forward with what is true and positive will open hearts to Jesus. That’s why I like the Book of Proverbs. It’s wisdom dipped in common sense, yet deep enough to engage both heart and mind.

      The key to continuing a conversation is to ask open, gentle questions – “what do you think about…” “have you every heard…” “has this ever…” “how did that make you feel..” AND then listen. Really listen.

  2. We did this – unintentionally – the other night! We started just talking about creation, which led to the degree of perfection in the garden, then on and on from one topic to the next – challenging and re-thinking (or maybe thinking about for the first time) topics we’d always just looked at at face value. It was fun and, of course, ended with sex cause, if you’re talking about what you’d do in perfect bodies in a perfect garden with no need to work, well…. what else do you do?

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